Bachelor of Medicine & Surgery

on Friday, June 6, 2008

MBBS?

I've just printed my offer letter to Kuantan Campus. My four eyes caught the sentence "Congratulations! We have the pleasure to inform you that the University has decided to offer you admission into the Bachelor's degree programme in MEDICINE AND SURGERY". My heartbeat increased. Am I really going to do this?? Am I really sure about this? Ya Allah, please give me strength..

I always remember when I was really small. The time when I'd just known the simple and the basis of life. The time when I just knew how to speak and understand other's words. I did understand when Abah said at that time, "Fatimah…become a doctor". After taking my bath, I asked Abah to dry my curly hair and he said, "Fatimah..become a doctor". After sending me to my kindergarten, "Fatimah..become a doctor". I just replied "alright".. During the time at primary school and secondary school, doctor was my ambition. At heart, inside my heart, I kept murmuring "what is so special with the "doctor"? Am I going to be very rich as a doctor?

A captured image from my favourite Japanese Drama "Team Medical Dragon"

Once, I hated biology. I hated memorizing the the details about the process of life. It is unseen. I can’t prove myself whether it is all true or not. But I loved physic. I become interested in my physic teachers, Cikgu Nafisah, Cikgu Muhammad (Educare Study Centre), Cikgu Harun (Pusat Tuisyen Dinamis). They taught me the reality of this physical world which I experience and prove it in my everyday life. It is very interesting. I loved helping my classmate in physics. I liked teaching them physics because I thought I have the better understanding in physics. During SPM, I was very confident to get high mark for physic although everyone kept saying that it was very tough. However, once the result was out, I was very shocked to get A1 in my other science subjects except for my physics. Why? Why? (It is Allah's plan)

During my foundation study at CFS IIUM, I learned almost the same thing as in my secondary school. Until then, I realized, my interest in physic always make me think the concept the other way around and I always mistakenly judge the concept. So, I can't score in my physic like in my secondary school anymore. What about my biology? I studied biology forcefully without interest, but Alhamdullillah, I can score for my biology better than my physics. Therefore, I think, if I can score studying without interest, what if I study with interest? I think the result will be better. I am destined to do Medicine and Surgery now, and what is the meaning of studying medicine and surgery without any interest? It is surely a waste. There are lots of people who want to do Medicine but they don't have the opportunity. I don't want to be an ungrateful servant of Allah. I don't want to.. I don't want to..

So, what's up now? I'm grateful and thankful for this opportunity. What are my next steps? ---->to be continued

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on Monday, May 19, 2008

Alhamdulillah..

Setelah 11 tahun, saya diberi peluang oleh Allah untuk merasai lagi nikmat mendapat adik baru. Asma' Abd Aziz, itulah nama yang telah desepakati oleh kami sekeluarga, hasil syura (bukan demokrasi atau dictator).

Saya terkenang kembali saat Abah nak daftar nama baru adik. Pagi-pagi lagi Abah keluar dr rumah dengan niat nak daftar nama adik "Asiyah" walaupun ramai adik-beradik x setuju. Cubaan pertama gagal lantaran lupa bawa surat nikah (lama dah kan x timang anak, sampai lupa procedure). Abah balik semula ke rumah n mencari-cari surat nikah yg mmg dah x tau ada kat mana. Bawah katil, bawah bantal, belakang almari, dalam almari, bawah almari, habis di selongkar dan alhamdulillah, jumpalah jugak surat nikah lusuh dan kuning yg dibuat pada kurun 1984. Abah pun bergegas semula ke Pejabat Pendaftaran Negara. Dalam hati Abah cuma ada "Asiyah..Asiyah..Asiyah". Abah ambik nombor giliran dan menunggu nombor dipanggil. Dengan harapan cubaan kedua menjadi kenyataan, Abah tunjukkan surat nikah. Rupa-rupanya surat nikah tahun 1984 dah tak diterima (surat format lama, org dah x pakai dah). Abah siap kene gi jumpa pegawai lagi, dan bila disemak,mmg comfirm, tahun 1984 masih gunakan surat nikah format lama. Abah diminta balik dan bawa surat beranak anak sebelum. Balik lah Abah dengan frustnya..Abah balik dan menceritakan segalanya pada kami kat rumah. Ummi tiba-tiba bersuara "dah tu ore lain gano?" Abah pun jawab, "ore lain muda-muda blako buleh anok. Kito nikoh lama dah". Aku dan adik-adik lain ketawa sakan dengar jawapan Abah. Emm..Last skali, Abah dah putus asa dgn nama Asiyah, dan kami bersetuju dengan plan asal, "Asma'".

Abah, 49, dan Ummi, 47. Pada usia 47, Ummi selamat melahirkan cahaya mata baru selepas 11 tahun berehat.. Satu kegembiraan yang sukar utk saya ungkapkan dengan kata-kata. Saya tahu, ramai kawan-kawan yang jeles..Itulah rezeki dari Allah. Kegembiraan saya mendapat adik pada usia 21 tahun tak kurang hebatnya Ummi dan Abah mendapat anak pada usia 47 dan 49 tahun. Saya dapat rasakan betapa gembira dan bahagianya mendapat cahaya mata. Betapa besar harapan Abah & Ummi untuk anak-anak. Penat dan lelah x pernah dipeduli. Ummi sampai tak sempat nak menjamah nasi, tak sempat nak bersihkan diri, tak sempat nak tidur, kerana menjaga n menyusukan adik asma'. Kesian kat ummi. Bila tengok keadaan ummi, saya yakin, begitulah juga keadaan ibu-ibu lain di luar sana. Kadang-kadang menitis air mata bila memikirkan apakah sumbangan saya kat Ummi sehingga hari ini???




Teringat saya akan kata-kata seorang sahabat yang paling dekat di hati saya, "Saat kita dilahirkan, kita menangis, tapi org lain gembira.. Semoga saat kita mati, kita gembira,tapi org lain menangis dgn pemergian kita".. Semoga kita menjadi anak yang soleh, pemberi syafaat kepada ibu & ayah kita kelak.."Ya Allah..Ampunkan dosaku & dosa kedua ibu bapaku..& kasihanilah mereka sebagaimana mereka mengasihani ku sejak kecil lagi.." AMEEN…